Rants and raves from around the celebrosphere

In an early morning ruling on June 10, the courts decided that Christie Brinkley would get sole custody of her two children from soon-to-be-ex perv Peter Cook.

Brinkley, 54, gets sole custody while 49-year-old Cook will continue to retain his visitation that includes every Wednesday and alternating weekends with 13-year-old Jack and 10-year-old Sailor.

OK: isn’t it bad enough that the kid has one celebrity parent and one parent who likes to chase teenage girls? Was it really necessary to name her “Sailor” as well? This poor chick hasn’t got a chance at a normal life!

Anyway, we digress. It’s not really much of a shocker that Brinkley will get the kids. During the course of the circus - excuse us, divorce trial - Brinkley revealed that Cook seduced his 18-year-old female assistant, spent $3000 a month on Internet porn, hung out at gay truck stops, and was arrested for buying drugs.

It seems that there are actually some people so unfit for parenthood that they make a supermodel look good in comparison.

Showing that he can rise above such melodrama, Cook rolled his eyes while Brinkley broke down in tears time and again on the witness stand.

“Shrek was more believable,” he said out loud during the proceedings.

We cannot confirm just where Cook saw the movie that he referenced during the trial. We have decided that he #1) took his date to see it since it was one of the few movies she could get into, #2) accidentally watched it on the computer thinking that it was going to be the porn version, Shriek, or #3) he watched it from the small TV in the back of a gay trucker’s rig.

Whatever the case, we doubt that he saw it with his kids during “quality happy father time”.